| T O P I C R E V I E W |
| tangled up in BLUE | ...or does the world just move to fast ...I met my friend Mike in junior high school, we were always good friends, instant buddys....later in high school I dated his sister, and we were still good friends....we always spoke, bull shitted each other, always had a few quick witty words to poke each other with just for grins....he sold me several cars in the last few years including a new Jeep a few weeks ago....I always considered him a buddy and friend from the "old days" when we were young punks...when we were teenagers we were at a party and he was ran over by a car while he was passed out in a haystack, and to this day I always asked him about the "stripe" he had from the accident, he still had tire tread marks on his chest from that incident....just a general good guy.... ...yesterday Mike committed suicide....how well did I really know him....I realized I don't know why he did it,I realized I don't even know where he lived or how many kids he had....there is speculation as to why, but no one will probably ever know what drove this bubbly friendly guy to decide to not come back from lunch, ever again... ...how well did I really know my old friend, apparently not nearly as well as I thought...how much time do people really spend listening to other people talk, maybe not enough...could anyone have helped him, who knows....just a tremendous waste of life....
......."we drink beer, we drink wine,
.......we're the Class of '69 "
RIP old friend.... This message has been edited by tangled up in BLUE on 04-26-2006 at 03:37 PM |
| tangled up in BLUE | sorry, posted in the wrong area.... |
| Marty Usher | Larry - sorry to hear about your friend and your loss. Suicide always has more than one victim. The family and friends always have the questions you presented in your post. Why? Should I have seen the signs? etc. You may never find the answers about your friend but maybe it will help you think about your other relationships in a different light.
Marty
|
| YellowFever | A permanent solution to a temporary problem...... Life is complex and had you known him better and been there everyday, you still may not have been able recognize or do anything. On the other hand, the folks you do know better, maybe you've enriched their lives and kept one of them from thinking of something like this. The glass is always half full!!!! |
| BeWare | Sorry to hear you lost a good friend. Possibly he would have ended his life sooner had it not been for friends such as you. As you said one will never know. Depression can either linger for time or hit hard and quick. |
| BradleyG | Larry, Sorry about your friend. Thanks for posting, as it helps me to think more about my friends and value my relationships with them. Brad |
| Snoman | I know your pain too well sorry! |
| tangled up in BLUE | quote:
Originally posted by BradleyG:
Larry, Sorry about your friend. Thanks for posting, as it helps me to think more about my friends and value my relationships with them. Brad
...as I get older I tend to visit funeral homes on a more regular basis, this week 2 of my classmates have passed....I realize age is creeping up on me, but these people weren't really that old.....it does make you stop for a few minutes and remember the good times, and hope there are plenty more ahead...never take friends or family for granted, never pass up an opportunity to visit your kids or grandkids...just lay down what you are doing and take the kids to the Dairy Queen, the work will be there when you return....your kids grow up, time passes and you need to reach out and taste all of life you can, one day you wake up in a box and it is too late to change these things..... .....I just find it so sad when an individual sees no way to face life and feels suicide is the only option....my uncle chose this way out when I was a kid and ironically it was the same exact method my friend chose yesterday....my uncle had been a federal fugitive for over 15 years and had built a respectable life when the federal agents finally located him, rather than possibly face decades behind bars he chose what he thought was the only way out.... ...you can have all the money and toys in the world, but time is one thing we never can have too much of... |
| SuperKat | So sorry to hear of your friends passing. This one sure hits close to home. |
| galaxie | TUIB, Sorry to here about your friend. This too happened to me 8 yrs. ago. He was a good friend of 30+ yrs. He was like a brother to me. I thought I knew him very well. He had back trouble & all the doctors said it was in his head. He told me it was real & he had this pain every day. My wife & I had dinner with him & his wife on a Sat. nite. We talked for an hour, just me & him. He told me he didn't know what to do. He was going to start pain management the next week. He took his life that Monday. That Sat. nite that we talked plays over & over in my mind. I keep wondering if only I told someone, but we've had these talks before. I really thought he would pull himself out of his depression. As we get older & look back, it's a shame to see good people's life cut short. As time passes it does get better. I'll never forget my friend. Hang in there & God Bless.....Mac |
| SirReal | tangled I too am sorry for your loss. Don't let the woulda coulda shoulda's get to you. Even if you knew his intent and tried to get him help, it doesn't always help. Sadly I know this first-hand. I did my very best for a friend but it wasn't enough. Be well my friend and go hug your wife.(oh yea right like I really needed to say that last part) |
| texasprowler | sorry about your friend thanks once again for making me think about important things |
| Tytanium-K | We NEVER really know anyone, Larry...sometimes not even ourselves...or what we're capable of--it takes a discerning [lucid] eye to see/recognize deep sadness in another's eyes! Having a Master's Degree in psychology & writing poetry since childhood...I tend to see beyond surface level in most [but not all] fellow human beings! Be careful what you ask for...right!?  |
| RADCAT RICH | TUIB,
sometimes we are blind to other people problems, or dont recognize the signs.... and other times there are no signs.
What makes people snap to no other option is very unsettling.
He had these thought many times before , i can assure you.
Sad loss non the less, dont blame yourself for not seeing this.Rich |
| CJ | Sorry to hear of the loss of your friend. Suicide leaves a lot of unanswered questions for those who are left behind. Everyone should always keep in mind that no one truly knows everything about someone. One never knows what a person has been through or is going through in their life, even people who are close to you. My brother (younger by 11 years) passed away 7 years ago. It was a week before his 38th birthday. He was 11 when my father passed away. He grew up with 5 sisters, mother and grandmother. He left for the Army as soon as he graduated from high school. When he got out, he made it clear that his life was his own and we were not to interfere, etc. etc. We all respected that. Unfortunately, he hid his drinking problem from everyone. Eventually, the problem took his life. As a family, we were devastated. We had no idea of the magnitude of the problem until it was too late. Could we have "saved" him.......not likely. Never assume that you know everything about someone.........not even those close to you. |
| remo | sorry to hear about your friend but even in death our friends send a clear message to us all life is short and love is forever cherish every moment you spend with the people you know and love |
