If you have previously registered, but forgotten your password, click here.

T O P I C     R E V I E W
392HEMI	> > > A retired corporate executive, now a widower, decided to take a vacation . > > He booked himself on a Caribbean cruise and proceeded to have the time of > his life, that is, until the ship sank. > > He found himself on an island with no other people, no supplies, nothing , > only bananas and coconuts. > > After about four months, he is lying on the beach one day when the most > gorgeous woman he has ever seen rows up to the shore. > In disbelief, he asks, "Where did you come from? How did you get here? She > replies, "I rowed from the other side of the island. I landed here when my > cruise ship sank," > > "Amazing," he notes. "You were really lucky to have a row boat wash up > with you," > > "Oh, this thing?" explains the woman. "I made the boat out of raw material > I found on the island. The oars were whittled from gum tree branches. I > wove the bottom from palm branches, and the sides and stern came from a > Eucalyptus tree." > > "But, where did you get the tools?" > > "Oh, that was no problem," replied the woman. "On the South side of the > island, a very unusual stratum of alluvial rock is exposed. I found if I > fired it to a certain temperature in my kiln, it melted into ductile iron > used that for tools and used the tools to make the hardware." > The guy is stunned. > > "Let's row over to my place," she says. > > After a few minutes of rowing, she docks the boat at a small wharf. > As the man looks to shore, he nearly falls off the boat. Before him is a > stone walk leading to an exquisite bungalow painted in blue and white. > While > > the woman ties up the rowboat with an expertly woven hemp rope, the man > can only stare ahead, dumb struck. As they walk into the house, she says > casuall y, > "It's not much, but I call it home. Sit down, please. > > Would you like a drink?" > > "No! No thank you," he blurts out, still dazed. "I can't take another drop > of co conut juice." > > "It's not coconut juice," winks the woman. "I have a still. How would you > like a Pina Colada?" > > Trying to hide his continued amazement, the man accepts, and they sit Down > on her couch to talk. > > After they have exchanged their stories, the woman announces, "I'm going > to slip into something more comfortable. Would you like to take a shower > and shave? There is a razor upstairs in the bathroom cabinet." > No longer questioning anything, the man goes into the bathroom. There, in > the cabinet, a razor made from a piece of tortoise bone. Two shells honed > to a hollow ground edge are fastened on to its end inside a swivel > mechanism. "This woman is amazing," he muses. "What next?" > When he returns, she greets him wearing nothing but vines, strategically > positioned, and smelling faintly of gardenias. She beckons for him to sit > down next to her. > > "Tell me," she begins suggestively, slithering closer to him, "We've been > out here for many months. You've been lonely. There's something I'm sur e > you really feel like doing right now, something you've been longing for?" > She stares into his eyes. He can't believe what he's hearing. "You mean. > he swallows excitedly and tears start to form in his eyes." . . . . . > "Don't tell me you've built a Golf Course !"
ETMIDZT	DOH!
BeWare	That's just wrong.
pumpkin	good one.
Tennessee Cat	You forgot to mention he was a eunuch!!!!!!!
Dale Beaman	Before or after that comment?