posted 12-01-2001 12:09 AM         

Isn't making a smoking section in a restaurant like making a peeing section in a swimming pool?

OK...so if the Jacksonville Jaguars are known as the "Jags" and the Tampa Bay Buccaneers are known as the "Bucs", what does that make the Tennessee Titans ?

If 4 out of 5 people SUFFER from diarrhea...does that mean that one enjoys it?

Why do we say something is out of whack? What's a whack?

Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery?

If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?

Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?

Why do croutons come in airtight packages? Aren't they just stale bread to begin with?

If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked, doesn't it follow that electricians can be delighted, musicians denoted, cowboys deranged, models deposed, tree surgeons debarked, and dry cleaners depressed?

Do Lipton Tea employees take coffee breaks?

What hair color do they put on the driver's licenses of bald men?

I thought about how mothers feed their babies with tiny little spoons and forks so I wondered what do Chinese mothers use? Toothpicks?

Why do they put pictures of criminals up in the Post Office? What are we supposed to do, write to them? Why don't they just put their pictures on the postage stamps so the mailmen can look for them while they deliver the mail?

If it's true that we are here to help others, then what exactly are the others here for?

You never really learn to swear until you learn to drive.

posted 12-01-2001 12:51 PM         

Maybe next time, huh?

posted 12-01-2001 01:50 PM         

I'll take the smoking section one.

A. I'd like to see a pee section in all swimming pools because -

1. That small amount of pee is nothing compared to the # of gals of water involved
2. The chlorine will kill the effects, and taste, so they tell me.
3. Anyone who learned to swim by 6 yrs old has probably pee'd in a swimming pool anyway
4. If you drink Coors beer, you are drinking Rocky Mtn. trout pee!!
5. If you handle raw chicken, fish, pork, lamb, beef, etc in your kitchen, there is probably more bacteria in that kitchen than you would ever want to believe. So, lets all pee in the pool!

6. The pioneers drank water from rivers, lakes, and streams; filled with pee/fecal from animals.

B. Promote building smoking sections in all larger restaurants. I don't want my second hand smoke to harm anyone.

C. Promote DC to install ashtrays into Prowlers, upon request.

D. Why did I get into this?

posted 12-01-2001 01:51 PM         

I enjoyed your post CJ...

Later...