posted 12-12-2005 02:57 PM         

Question:  When is a retiree's bedtime?
Answer:  Three hours after he falls asleep on the couch.

Question:  How many retirees to change a light bulb?
Answer:  Only one, but it might take all day.

Question:  What's the biggest gripe of retirees?
Answer:  There is not enough time to get everything done.

Question:  Why don't retirees mind being called Seniors?
Answer:  The term comes with a 10% percent discount.

Question:  Among retirees what is considered formal attire?
Answer:  Tied shoes.

Question:  Why do retirees count pennies?
Answers:  They are the only ones who have the time.

Question:  What is the common term for someone who enjoys work and refuses to retire?
Answer:  NUTS!

Question:  Why are retirees so slow to clean out the basement, attic or garage?
Answer:  They know that as soon as they do, one of their adult kids will want to store stuff there.

Question:  What do retirees call a long lunch?
Answer:  Normal.

Question:  What is the best way to describe retirement?
Answers:  The never ending Coffee Break.

Question:  What's the biggest advantage of going back to school as a retiree?
Answer:  If you cut classes, no one calls your parents.

Question:  Why does a retiree often say he doesn't miss work, but misses the people he used to work with?
Answer:  He is too polite to tell the whole truth.