posted 09-06-2005 03:33 PM         

Law of Mechanical Repair: After your hands become coated
with grease, your nose will begin to itch.

Law of the Workshop: Any tool, when dropped, will roll to the
least accessible corner.

Law of the Telephone: When you dial a wrong number, you never
get a busy signal.

Law of the Alibi: If you tell the boss you were late for work
because you had a flat tire, the very next morning you will have a
flat tire.

Variation Law: If you change lines (or traffic lanes), the one
you were in will start to move faster than the one you are in now. (works
every time)

Bath Theorem: When the body is fully immersed in water, the
telephone rings.

Law of Close Encounters: The probability of meeting someone
you know increases when you are with someone you don't want to be seen with.

Law of the Result: When you try to prove to someone that a
machine won't work, it will.

Law of Biomechanics: The severity of the itch is inversely
proportional to the reach.

Theatre Rule: At any event, the people whose seats are
furthest from the aisle arrive last

Law of Coffee: As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee,
your boss will ask you to do something which will last until the coffee is
cold.

Murphy's Law of Lockers: If there are only two people in a
locker room, they will have adjacent lockers.

Law of Dirty Rugs/Carpets: The chances of an open-faced jelly
sandwich of landing face down on a floor covering are directly
correlated to the newness and cost of the carpet/rug.

Law of Location: No matter where you go, there you are.

Law of Logical Argument: Anything is possible if you don't
know what you are talking about.

Brown's Law: If the shoe fits, it's ugly.