posted 08-15-2003 07:01 PM         

All my life I have looked towards people for their appreciation of things that I have done. Mike and I have been through a lot and are working through this. I appreciate the emails which I received to call Mike and work this out.

There is no dark side to the POA. Just some details between Mike and I.

Since the start of the move from Cali to Indy it has been a stress test. 15 years ago I stopped watching the news and stopped caffeine for a stress condition I have, didn't want to take meds then but now I have started with meds and not up to the recommended strength yet. My mom had a stroke during the move and has had three operations since November of last year. She has been in the hospital since May and her recovery is not going as planned. I am at my third address since November. And bought this house for Debbie, Mom and I. Also Indy is the town which my father died(some know the true story). That's when I ran and not walked to Cali to escape from this town, My Mom wanted to move back so we did. So far so good.

Debbie and I are trying to work things out, we have been broken up for a while(month) and she called last night finally and wants to work things out. Just got off the phone for almost 2 hours. phew The stress of all this put me over the top.

I have lived a life of Riley, no stress or responsibility,,,,, Now I have it all thrown in my lap in a short period. People that deal with stress day in and day out and raising kids and all of life pit falls handle it better than others. I have a problem with it.

Maybe now with meds, shrink and God(starting to go to church) the purpose of life will be clearer.

I am not looking for sympathy, just trying to make it clear why I snapped. Time for me to grow up and be responsible, I was fooling myself.

I know all of you might not forgive me, I don't blame you.

Again from my heart I apologize.

The POA site is the place to be.

Don't blame Mike for his reactions, he has a lot on his plate and I shouldn't have pointed fingers.

posted 08-15-2003 08:32 PM         

Best wishes for sorting through all these things.

posted 08-15-2003 08:35 PM         

Life as Rocks (and Beer)

A philosophy professor stood before his class with some items on the table in front of him. When the class began, wordlessly he picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with rocks, about 2" in diameter.

He then asked the students if the jar was full. They agreed that it was. So the professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar. He shook the jar lightly. The pebbles, of course, rolled into the open areas between the rocks.

He then asked the students again if the jar was full. They agreed it was. The professor picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar. Of course, the sand filled up everything else. He then asked once more if the jar was full. The students responded with a unanimous "Yes."

The professor then produced two cans of beer from under the table and proceeded to pour their entire contents into the jar - effectively filling the empty space between the sand. The students laughed.

"Now," said the professor, as the laughter subsided, "I want you to recognize that this jar represents your life. The rocks are the important things - your family, your partner, your health, and your children - things that if everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full. The pebbles are the other things that matter - like your job, your house, your car. The sand is everything else - the small stuff."

"If you put the sand into the jar first," he continued "there is no room for the pebbles or the rocks. The same goes for your life. If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff, you will never have room for the things that are important to you. Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness. Play with your children. Take time to get medical checkups. Take your partner out dancing. There will always be time to go to work, clean the house, give a dinner party and fix the disposal. Take care of the rocks first - the things that really matter. Set your priorities. The rest is just sand."

One of the students raised her hand and inquired what the beer, represented. The professor smiled. "I'm glad you asked. It just goes to show you that no matter how full your life may seem, there's always room for a couple of beers.”

Also I want to thank one Canadian for all the support to work things out.

You know who you are.....

posted 08-15-2003 09:52 PM         

Good to see you back...

As said before "Takes a really big man to admit he is wrong."

Your mom should be really proud right now. As a mom, I know I would be.

Take care of those 'rocks' they are truly the best parts of life.

posted 08-16-2003 11:59 AM         

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Current mods: Mopar dual exhaust & front mudflaps; MacMotorsports Air Intake;
Real Rod Air Patrol; Graphics by Balistek Designs; ($8) Chrome grille; Chrome
tire valve-stem covers; Painted rear bumper lettering; Prowler Pro Gears; Synthetic
Oil; Raybestos Ceramic Brake Pads; TGF Door Panel Inserts & Headrest Covers;
SheepskinExpress Sheepskin Seatcovers; Grille Light; Pinstriping by Bo Boring;
Painted Valve Cover; Window Tinting; Windshield Visor Banner; Front Bumper
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Cover, Sill and Carper Covers, Aero Front Covers and Roadster Rear Pan, rear
bumpers removed; rear mudflaps; painted calipers; Prowler Products by Gary
Drilled Rotors, front and rear; Painted tach; and Jay's Aluminum Billet Center Caps
w/shimmers, Chrome Lugnuts and Chrome Radio Bezel Shimmer.

More 'Pumpkin' photos . . . . . More cars and other stuff

posted 08-18-2003 10:13 AM         

I'd say welcome back, but in my eyes you never left.
I respect anyone who sincerely apologizes.

Heck, even I made a mistake last year!

Best of luck!