Posts: 1369
From: manahawkin, nj, ocean
Registered: APR 2002

posted 03-16-2005 08:51 AM         

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These are all clean…

1. Two antennas meet on a roof, fall in love and get married. The ceremony
wasn't much, but the reception was excellent.
>
> 2. Two hydrogen atoms walk into a bar. One says, "I've lost my electron."
The other says, "Are you sure?" The first replies, "Yes, I'm positive..."
>
> 3. A jumper cable walks into a bar. The bartender says, "I'll serve you, but
don't start anything."
>
> 4. Two peanuts walk into a bar, and one was a salted.
>
> 5. A sandwich walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Sorry we don't serve
food in here."
>
> 6. A dyslexic man walks into a bra.
>
> 7. A man wa! lks into a bar with a slab of asphalt under his arm and says: "A
beer please, and one for the road."
>
> 8. Two cannibals are eating a clown. One says to the other: "Does this taste
funny to you?"
>
> 9. "Doc, I can't stop singing 'The Green, Green Grass of Home.'" "That
sounds like Tom Jones Syndrome." "Is itcommon?" Doc says, "It's Not Unusual."
>
> 10. Two cows standing next to each other in a field, Daisy says to Dolly, "I
was artificially inseminated this morning." "I don't believe you," said Dolly.
"It's true, no
> bull!" exclaimed Daisy.
>
> 11. An invisible man marries an invisible woman. The kids were nothing to
look at either.
>
> 12. A man takes his Rottweiler to the vet and says, "My dog's cross-eyed, is
there anything you can do for him?" "Well," says the vet, "let's have a look at
him." So he
> picks the dog up and examines his eyes, then checks ! his teeth. Finally, he
says, "I'm going to have to put him down." "What? Because he's cross-eyed?"
"No, because he's really heavy."
>
> 13. I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day but I couldn't find
any.
>
> 14. I went to the butcher's the other day and I bet him 50 bucks that he
couldn't reach the meat off the top shelf. He said, "No, the steaks are too
high."
>
> 15. I went to a seafood disco last week... and pulled a mussel.
>
> 16. What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh.

Posts: 1216
From: Connecticut
Registered: NOV 2004

posted 03-16-2005 09:13 AM         

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I liked those

------------------
Pantera

Posts: 1216
From: Connecticut
Registered: NOV 2004

thanks

Posts: 7907
From: Las Cruces, NM, USA
Registered: DEC 2001

Posts: 1369
From: manahawkin, nj, ocean
Registered: APR 2002

Posts: 2120
From: Sedalia Mo USA
Registered: MAY 2003

Posts: 47
From: vacaville,ca,usa
Registered: SEP 2004

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